Brave’s mascot Blooper needs a Falcons sample after this hit stick

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By absolutely leveling 2-bit during the recent Home Depot Tool Race, the Atlanta Braves mascot Blooper should expect an invitation to try for his hometown Atlanta Falcons.

Phil the Bucket may already be GOAT from the Home Depot Tool Race in Truist Park, but the Atlanta Braves mascot Blooper just became a legend after riding Jessie “The Hammer” Tuggle on bad, ole 2-Bit.

For those who do not know, the Home Depot Tool Race is as much Atlanta as getting stuck in traffic and lemon pepper wings. Phil the Bucket is as celebrated as Mickey Mouse, while 2-Bit is at least the wrestling heel of Scott “Razor Ramon” Hall. As for Blooper, he changes the game for every breath he takes. The Atlanta Falcons must bring him to Flowery Branch now!

Blooper-ear-piercing 2-bit on the Truist Park warning track is sensational mascot-on-mascot crime.

The self-awareness this guy has is also the next level as Blooper understands he will be suspended by the NFL for four games after putting the timber on ole 2-Bit.

They’re cool now that you can never put a price on going viral, bruh!

Young ATLiens will grow up with posters of this unforgettable gadget on their bedroom walls.

The Atlanta Braves mascot Blooper should start as a linebacker for the Atlanta Falcons

No doubt about it, this is how undeniable excellence looks in mascot form. When a set of anthropomorphic tools takes your beloved Braves ball cap from you and whizzes around with it in your house in front of all your friends, you do whatever it takes to get it back. With hits that would make Keith Brooking and the late Tommy Nobis proud, let’s see Blooper make the dirty bird, I’all!

No one even really knows what Blooper is, but he is an ATLien at his core, 100 percent. If Blooper could speak, he would only pronounce rhymes constructed by OutKast, Ludacris, and Childish Gambino. When he bleeds, he bleeds Chick-fil-A sauce. It was completely yellow like the one that Coldplay sang, but the clocks were definitely cleaned at the speed of sound with this forearm shudder as he tried to fix you, 2-Bit!

“Scientific product runs amok” is all we did not know we needed. Blooper has not been here forever, but he’s definitely made a name for himself, okay. Just look at him chasing the GOOD Phil the Bucket to get his hat back. By signing Blooper, the Falcons will be 1.5 wins better in the over / under division of sportsbooks across the country. Go and make some money.

Blooper is the hero Atlanta deserves, and even better, he’s the one Atlanta needs right now.

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